


Last Night I accepted Death W Open Arms

by TavecIncertum



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst with a Happy Ending, Connor has depression we all know it, Depression, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Oneshot, Random & Short, References to Depression, Short One Shot, Suicide Attempt, Whump, Whumpfiction, human!AU, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:41:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26656048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TavecIncertum/pseuds/TavecIncertum
Summary: Markus accidentally misses what is intended to be a 'final text' from Connor. Hopefully, when he gets to him, he isn't too late.(Also known as 'Depression whump fic'. Interrupted Suicide. Need I say more?)Human!AU.
Relationships: Connor & Markus (Detroit: Become Human), Connor/Markus (Detroit: Become Human)
Kudos: 83





	Last Night I accepted Death W Open Arms

**Author's Note:**

> You ever get so desperate to write you’re willing to go wherever your brain takes you? Me too. This is the product of that. I started listening to a station for IamJakeHill and stumbled upon the song ‘Last Night I Accepted Death W Open Arms’ by Lil Revive & Darko. So I went with it. Whatever my lil tortured soul wanted to make. 
> 
> I’m sorry for doing this to us friends. Hold my hand if ya wanna.
> 
> As always, thanks for taking a minute to vibe with me & Stay frosty guys.

Fear. It was all that clenched Markus’ chest when he finally turned his phone on outside the theatre, barely able to see the screen from the flashing marquee lights. 

**17 missed calls. 4 new voice mails. 32 unread messages.**

The longer he scrolled through the texts, the more he felt shimmering tears collect across the surface of mismatched eyes. Adrenaline was the next closest feeling and his lungs seized in a tight clench. He couldn’t run to his car fast enough and all safety was ignored when the engine was cranked up and the tires screeched against pavement from his departure. 

Neon lights became a blur and even as traffic lights turned red, quick swerves took him neatly through the hesitating vehicles. Turns were taken recklessly and the back of the old cruiser struggled to keep traction on freshly wet asphalt. No matter how many times he dialed his lover back, the line went straight to voice-mail and that factor only added more pressure to the race to cross the city as quickly as he possibly could. 

_‘Always know it wasn’t your fault.’_  
_‘I just can’t take it anymore, please forgive me Markus.’_

Connor sat limply in a bathtub full of cold water; lukewarm, bare shoulders pressed against the icy tile in slump and hands idly clenching the sides of the porcelain tightly enough to turn his knuckles white. His arms trembled from the stressed tension and body shook in response to the stagnant bath-water chilling his core. 

He stared at the cellphone between his knees in the water, bubbles still breaking the surface every now and again as the liquid compromised the air in the device. It had long stopped lighting up the screen and showing him the list of messages he’d sent as a testament of his suicidal thoughts. 

There was no way he could back out now that he’d been so dramatic. _There was no way he wanted to._  


His eyes ached in response to the blinding white shower-wall he’d been locked onto for what felt like an hour now. He wasn’t blinking often enough and the sting went ignored; traded for fog over his vision. Acid washed the lining of his stomach and left the burning taste in the back of his throat in the tight seizes that clenched his abdomen. 

Brown eyes shifted to the bathroom door and if not for the fatigue in his entire being, he had half a mind to lock the doorknob. Instead, he only made the decision he needed to act quickly before someone came to stop him and he lost the opportunity. 

Wet fingers scraped the floor near the side of the tub and when they met cold steel, they coiled around the gun without hesitation and pulled it into the space with him. A sort of admiration took a moment from his flighty mind, watching the incandescent lighting catch the shiny edges of the lethal weapon. The only distraction was the welling of tears behind his eyes that spilled down his cheeks without consent or effort. 

The overwhelming sadness that clenched his heart and chest and brain; it made everything in his body hurt. Everything in his form was tired, down to his very spirit. It felt heavy, too heavy to carry anymore. 

His mind took him many places as he stared down his final destination, flashes of all reasoning assaulting his brain and desperately trying to find something, anything to entertain him. Every face, every memory, the pain was wrapped around the borders and packed into the edges. Hurt contorted his face in a deep grimace and he hadn’t noticed the slowly piquing emotion as he used his numb-feeling hands to cock the pistol and ready a bullet. 

A high pitched, zoning screech rattled his ears and deafened him as anxiety flooded his veins. Pure panic from his own intentions pricked his skin with sudden tingles and he couldn’t contain the heaves of breath that took everything he had to control. 

His body rocked in the water and one hand pulled tightly on walnut curls, yanking them roughly in an attempt to collect the spasming sobs that choked him out. When had he started crying again? He hadn’t even realized it. 

A final burst of resolve and his teeth grit tightly, the barrel pressing to his head and the sound of the bathroom door slamming open being drowned out by the click of metal getting locked against metal. 

_It jammed._  


**“Connor!”**  


Water splashed all over the bathroom floor in a wave, a loud collision being made as Markus none-too-gently pinned his lover against the tile and left the pistol to sink into the remaining bath. Hands frantically held wrists to the wall and Connor was left staring at the semi-soaked male, looking back at him with tears vividly streaming down his reddened cheeks.

“Why did you come?” The only question the brunette could manage in emotionless words, sight barely able to focus on the image that was his visibly distraught lover. 

At first, the inquiry speared him but after a moment, he peeled the male off the tile and instead, pulled him to his chest so tightly he could feel his muscles trembling from the hold. “Because my baby was trying to leave me.”  


All bets were off the second Connor felt the secure wrap of Markus’ arms around him and the heat the other's body seemed to pour out in offering to his chilled exterior. He couldn’t manage a sound other than hiccupping sobs that were muffled into Markus’ neck and they only furthered when a hand started to pet the back of his head in soft sweeps. 

“I love you, I love you so fucking much.” Frantic kisses were placed on his exposed skin, from his temple to his cheek and forehead; wherever Markus could reach from his hold. “Please, please, please... Don’t leave me, baby, don’t leave me, please.” 

The way Markus’ voice cracked and finally broke at the end of his plea, snapped Connor’s heart along with it, his dead-feeling arms doing everything they could to latch onto the male at last. 

“I’m sorry, Markus, I’m sorry.” The brunette male murmured and was immediately hushed with a closer cradle of his head. 

“It’s not your fault, you can’t help it, none of it’s your fault.” Markus soothed, doing his damnedest to reign in his own emotions with quieted, shuddering sniffles. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner.” 

When silence finally thinned between them and both bodies started to shiver, Connor was scooped out of the tub in a sturdy hold and tediously dried off with a fluffy towel. His form sat on the bathroom counter when his lover tended to himself and as soon as he was back in arms reach, he was quick to accept the hold that transported him with ease. 

Plush bedding surrounded his being soon enough and the surprising part was another body joining him, pulling the blankets back and burying deep into their warmth. Markus’ seeking hold didn’t stop there and he wasn’t satisfied until Connor was tucked under his arm and had a leg wrapped around his hip in clinging comfort. A warm hand grazed across the thigh that curved close to his side and the opposite found itself lost in sweet brown-sugar curls. 

“Are you sure you can stay...?” A gentle, worried question. 

“I’m sure. There’s no way in hell I’d leave you to sleep alone tonight.” Markus gave a pull forward and met Connor’s forehead in a lingering kiss, letting him tuck back to his neck shortly after. “I’m right here and I’m going to be right here.” 

The only response he received from the brunette was a tight grip on his form, a squeeze bringing him closer if that was possible. Rhythmic touch ran itself up and down Connor’s back and whether he wanted to or not, his body was urgently demanding sleep against all of his wishes. 

Markus started to feel small increases in Connor’s weight and merely kept himself busy as the tension started to leave his beloved's body at last. Soft breath puffed against the side of his neck and for the first little bit, he counted them in gratitude. It was hard not to be grateful when he’d already imagined a hundred visions of the gruesome scene he had been about to walk into. 

At that moment and from there on, he thanked whoever was listening for the best possible outcome of the night. Having Connor in his arms _alive._

**Author's Note:**

> Stole the idea from the lines in a JakeHill song - Rest in Pieces. Really hit a chord and I had to act upon it. 
> 
> _They said he was a youngblood, couldn't take the pressure_  
>  _Grab the pistol put it to his head, it's to depression_  
>  _Then the gun jammed, and he thought about his actions_  
>  _One more chance at life that's what he wanted, that's what happened_
> 
> Cross Posted on Tumblr.  
> https://tavecincertum.tumblr.com/tagged/mywriting


End file.
